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| "I kind of envy what you had with your dad. I mean, I know he died and all." - Maya |
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To afford this flick every opportunity to be enjoyable, I went into it with an open mind. I completely removed all preconceived notions about the movie and let the sounds and images wash over me. I wasn't sure if I was in for a remake or a sequel. Would it be a docudrama, like 1972's The Legend of Boggy Creek? Or perhaps a Bigfoot horror flick like Abominable. My actions were all to no avail, as this particular movie fits into neither category and is entirely unwatchable. The first few minutes are an exciting start to the old bait and switch con. We get a girl running in the dark, a fleeting look at the creature chasing her, then we cut to a morning crime scene to put together what happened. Then things quickly switch to after school special mode. We're shown the attractive Melissa Carnell jogging to an awful tweener song. And it's a song that just won't end. At this point the plot simply becomes morons in the swamp and lonely Jennifer's (Carnell) endless flashbacks for her dead dad. There are, of course, the staples required for any “outsiders in the south” movies. A local shop - a cafe in this instance - with weirdo rednecks, the scary first encounter with the friendly neighbor, and the tales of a creature in the woods that can mate with human females. Too bad we didn't actually see any mating attempts as this may have given us something to take our minds of how boring this movie actually is. There is a fair amount of blood and guts, but most of the shots are too fleeting for any real gore hounds. The only crowd this flick may appeal to are the women who spend all day watching the Lifetime Movie Channel. Or guys who watch fishing shows, because there is a lot of time spent in montage scenes in a boat on the lake, watching the wildlife. It's almost like they came up with an idea to setup a story, then forgot to write the actual story. How Shavon Kirksey got one of the lead roles is beyond my comprehension. She delivers her line, then smiles. Deliver. Smile. Repeat. Ugh. Conversely, we have Julin on screen for about six seconds. What a waste of talent. To top that off, they break b-movie rule #1, “If you don't show nudity, don't mention nudity.” We're teased with a couple of naked back sex scenes and one off-screen shower. There doesn't have to be nudity, but definitely don't taunt us with it. Especially when we're already wanting to turn it off. In all fairness, the ending was entertaining. One, because it meant the movie was over. And, two, because it different than the rest of the movie. Unfortunately, it was far from original. The exact same ending has occurred in a number of Sasquatch stories. (Including one mentioned earlier in this review.) And it did not even remotely make this story worth sitting through. There is currently a rash of swamp and/or forest creature movies. This one will soon be forgotten. The only way you can drink enough brew to make it to the end of this one is if you hit your pass out limit. It's not so bad that it's funny and there are no other factors to really catch your interest. Do yourself a favor and skip this one. You can thank me later. |











